This morning I woke up and looked at one of my two calendars. My Wayne Dyer Hay House calendar said, “Set a personal goal to be in love with the most beautiful, exciting, worthy person ever – you!” I pondered that for a moment and thought back to when my journey from soul-sucking life to magnificence made a major turn; it was when I focused on loving myself. That step happened when I took Louise Hay’s course on loving yourself, which included using a mirror for affirmation. Before I learned conscious, focused love of self, I went through most days feeling very little love toward myself.
The journey from soul-sucking life to a life you love takes some soul searching and question asking. Before the journey I felt like I was living a fraudulent life. I would get up in the morning, pour coffee into my veins to wake up, get ready and as I walked out the door to work I put on a happy face. I pretended that I loved my life when inside I was living a life of quiet desperation. I was unhappy despite the fact that I had the great husband and son, big house and was successful.
I created this miserable life I was living, but did not know how to change it. One by one the teachers came forward and the ‘a-ha’ moments slowly moved me into a life I absolutely love. Here are 3 ways to move into loving yourself so you too can create a life you desire and deserve. This means you can stop living a life of quiet desperation!
3 Ways to Love Yourself
Look in the mirror and say, “I Love You”!
The first time I looked in the mirror and said, “I Love You” was scary and it felt awkward. I didn’t believe it. From my abusive childhood I took into my adult life the messages that I was unlovable and unloving. These 2 thoughts did not serve me. How could I expect anyone to love me if I did not love myself? Loving yourself is key to creating a life you love. People treat you differently when you love yourself. People are able to love you when you love yourself. You were not born un-loveable, you learned it and you can unlearn it. Keep saying it to yourself until you believe it!
Fill Your Pot of Gold
You have a pot of gold inside you and every time you do for others a piece of gold leaves your pot. When your pot is empty you have nothing to give. Are you a women who keeps on giving even when your pot of gold is empty? This makes you tired, angry and resentful. The only way to fill up your pot of gold is with self-care activities. Self-care is the ultimate gift you can give yourself and your family. When you love yourself, you know how important it is to take care of yourself on a regular basis. Even the airlines tell you to put your own air mask on first before helping others. When you don’t take care of yourself, over time you have nothing left to give. Schedule self-care activities on your calendar to keep your pot of gold full!
Be Present in the Moment
How many times during a day do you multi-task? For example, you may be talking on the phone with your child’s school and reading your email at the same time. Have you ever tried to do this when you call one of those numbers that asks you questions and then you have to press a number to answer the question. Maybe you are asked to press 1 if you are a new client or 2 if you are an existing client. These calls take focused concentration and multi-tasking does not allow you to do that. I know in my own life I have had to go back and listen to the options because I was multi-tasking and did not hear the options the first time. What about when you are at home with your children. Are you present with them or is your mind at work? Multi-tasking or thinking about other things you need to do and not the person right in front of you is exhausting. When you focus on one task at a time, you can finish the task more quickly. When you focus on your child right in front of you and really be present in what the two of you are doing together, you are teaching your child how important it is to be present in the moment. I know I missed a lot when I was with my son and focusing on work and not him. I am just glad I woke up and started focusing on being present in the moment. I encourage you to leave work at work and focus on only one thing at a time. This is just another way to love yourself and those around you.
Make a conscious decision to take steps toward self-love. It is the greatest gift you can give yourself and the nicest thing you can do for your life. If you are feeling unlovable or unloving, email me and let’s chat. Love thy self!